the pursuit of Jesus… and other ramblings

**written at an earlier date**
on a scale from 1 to 10, i may have teared up several times in church this morning. i’m not entirely sure if that was because of the unplanned caffeine consumption earlier this morning or just an incredibly moving message from Pastor Peter, but it happened.

treasure

there have been a lot of truly great takeaways from the recent sermon series, first comes love. today centered around the verse in Matthew 6:21:

for where your treasure is, there your heart will follow

as a veteran of youth group and Christian clubs on campus, i’ve heard this verse a million times. i get it: whatever you pursue after, that is where your heart will be. in my so-many-years of existence, i’ve seen that to be true. but i love that this most recent application of the verse focused primarily on what it looks like in relationships.

i.e. dating doesn’t end with marriage.

the pursuit

that word gets thrown around a LOT in christian circles. mostly it is used in conversations with single women who are frustrated with never finding the right guy (actually right here i could go off on a pretty hefty tangent about “the right guy”). they are told to let the man pursue… which can be a problem when it seems like most men are always just okay with “hanging out” (another tangent i could go on… but won’t). so what’s so important about pursuit?

AH the verse. where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. for couples, the pursuit is focusing on what you treasure and then going after it. through the act of pursuit, one forges unity and attraction. i mean, the more i dwell on something (whether it’s the idea of a guy or a vocational dream), the more i become attached to it. it’s actually a little frightening really.

whatever is true

OH so that’s why the verse in philippians is so key:

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.

whatever your mind dwells on the most, that’s what your heart desires. and it doesn’t have to start out with that desire, but with time, the more attention and pursuit you give, the more your heart will want it. so if you’re giving attention to something that’s not good, well, i mean… that’s what your heart will be set on.

likewise, if you want your heart to desire something, you pursue it. this is where the tears started to build up. if you want God to be the desire of your heart, you have to pursue him. but legit pursue him, not half-ass pursue him. YES, i said half-ass.

get it girl

no one wants someone to sort of pursue them. it’s a measure of interest and intention. a ‘sort of’ pursuit says, i sort of care… yuck. no one loves lukewarm affection. that made me realize, that’s pretty much what i’m saying to God about our relationship when im’ like, meh, i could care less if i spend time in the word or spend time in prayer.

i’m pretty sure it was some sort of internal conviction that made me start to tear up. pursuing the Lord should be the most important thing in my life. sometimes it is, and sometimes it is less of a priority. but it’s time. i’m pretty sick and tired of having my heart set on unimportant things and then getting disappointed as a result of my misplaced desire. SICK AND TIRED.

changing direction always takes some time and a little forcefulness. i mean, have you ever tried to change direction on a sled? there’s lot of leaning, pulling, and persisting, and eventually you can get the sled to turn. likewise, desiring to spend time in prayer or studying the Bible doesn’t happen overnight. often it requires forcing yourself to do it every day and then praying for the desire to do it. but it happens, and the Lord will definitely honor that (i mean, why wouldn’t he?!).

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